I'm a pastor's wife, mom, and then Author, Biblical Counselor, Life Purpose Coach, Financial Coach, Bible Teacher, and Speaker.
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According to Psychology Today, the empty nest syndrome is, "A transitional period in life that highlights loneliness and loss." Many parents experience this when all their children leave the home. The symptoms are: Sadness, loss, depression, loneliness, distress, and a loss of purpose and meaning in life. It is especially hard to a stay-at-home parent as well as a single parent. I heard one time that if you prepare for the inevitable, it will lessen the pain of it when it comes. Well, I had been preparing for it but it did not lessen the pain at all.
When my oldest son left, I went into his room the next day with a bucket of paint and completely transformed a teenager's bedroom into a guest room. This helped because I no longer was looking at things that reminded me of when he lived here. I missed him but felt comfort knowing he was only 30 minutes away.. He would also visit about once a week. Now it's different; he joined the Air Force and there's really no telling when I will see my son again, which only adds more sadness. Moreover, my second and remaining son, is moving across the country in 3 weeks to attend college and live permanently. I certainly won't see him once a week! This only adds more grief to my plate.Yes, I already have the paint and decor ready for his room transformation!
It is recommended that you find things to keep you busy such as have an active social life, pick up a hobby, travel, and/or pursue career or educational goals. Although I keep very busy writing books and doing DIY home projects, I'm still dealing with the grief. I know eventually it will subside. I'm grateful I have the most wonderful husband who makes me laugh and is helping me through this transition.
How about you? Have you experienced the empty nest syndrome? How did you deal with it? What do you wish you had done differently?
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When you hear the word “womanhood,” what comes to your mind? When I set out to write my book, “Purposed for Womanhood," I was appalled at what I found on the internet as I searched the word “womanhood.” The results were erotic and perverted. It was certainly not what I expected. It’s no wonder many church-going women buy into the latest trend of showing lots of cleavage or their breasts. They don’t have a Biblical understanding of womanhood.
Biblical womanhood calls for decency, dignity and self-respect. Some may think they have to give up fashion and dress like the Amish women (no offense to them intended at all). We certainly don’t have to go to the extreme. But we are called to use wisdom and discretion. It breaks my heart to see young women (who claim to be Christian) dressing in a manner that illustrates they are still allowing the world to dictate their fashion picks. Ladies, if you are in ministry or are a church leader, please be the example the other women desperately need. Don’t show cleavage or your breasts. If you do, you don’t have the right to complain that people are looking at you a certain way or that men are being aroused by what you are exposing. I’m even seeing this type of dress on Christian television. How sad and disturbing that the network even allows this.
Let’s respect and honor our God. Let’s be the example the church needs. Only then will we be the example the world needs. We cannot bring the world into the church. We are to be the light they desperately need.
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A few years ago I attempted to sign into my Wordpress blog account. I tried and tried but to no avail. I researched the web to find a justifiable reason for my blog site not opening. It turns out that when I was in the midst of switching web hosts, my blog was deleted because it was linked to the host of my previous website. Frustrated? You better believe it! I wrote for five years in that blog and never even thought I would need a backup of all my writings.
So here I am, starting from scratch. This inconvenient circumstance reminded me of when I had to start my life over after being married for 20 years. We all, at one time or another, are forced to start over because life throws curve balls at us.
How do you handle curve balls? Change? Crisis? Loss? In order to stay sane in this insane world we live in, it is crucial that we learn how to handle change in an effective way. Many people choose to become bitter and angry at what happens to them. They don't realize that anger and bitterness robs them of joy.
Don't allow unexpected circumstances to defeat you. Just like when I educated myself on the blog issue, you should educate yourself on whatever change life has thrown at you. Learn how to handle that change, embrace it, and find the good in it. As my hubby always says, "flip that baby!"