I'm a pastor's wife, mom, and then Author, Biblical Counselor, Life Purpose Coach, Financial Coach, Bible Teacher, and Speaker.
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Do you ever tell a friend about something that just happened to you and they’re quick to give you their opinion? They immediately give you their solution to your problem. They don’t realize it but they’re insinuating that you are not wise enough to solve your own problems. How about that friend that all they do is quote scriptures to you? Don’t you ever want to say to these friends, “Look, I just need to vent. I don’t need you to solve my problem, and I already know the Bible. Can you just be my friend?”
Do you ever just wish to have a friendship with someone, but they only come to you when they need something from you? They suck you dry and then you don’t hear from them again until they have a new challenge. Then there are those who only reach out to you to send you articles or videos on subjects they like but you have no interest in. Yet you wish they would reach out to say, “Hey, how are you? I’ve been thinking of you. We should catch up soon.” Then there are those that you are friendly with, but they have no interest in reciprocating the friendliness. Actually, all they do is talk about themselves. They never ask you how you are doing. It's all one sided.
I find that the older we get, the more difficult it is to find meaningful friendships. When I was much younger, I had many friends. The older I got, the less friends I had. I understand that many times, people are busy with their families and their lifestyles. Some may already have friends and feel that they don’t need a new friend. These things make a person feel sad, hurt, and lonely.
Don’t be that kind of friend. Be the friend that is sensitive to people’s needs. Reciprocate the friendship. Be an active listener. Don’t assume you are being asked for counsel. Wait until you are asked for your opinion. Don’t be overly religious and assume your friend doesn’t have the faith to pull through in their situation. Give them more credit than that. And for the love of God, stop saying, “THIS TOO SHALL PASS!” Just be a friend!